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Completed 5 consecutive days of yoga for the second week.  Wasn’t sure I was going to make it to class this morning, but I woke up early enough to be on time for Sunrise Yoga.  Did party and network last night but was in bed just after 12.  I told myself that I would just let my body determine if I was going to make it.  It wanted to, and I realized it would take less effort to put on my yoga drag and go to class than try and go back to sleep.

Few new faces but more regular ones.  Felt stronger than I did in yesterday’s class and as I’m doing my poses realized I needed this today just for the running.  I’m trying to take it easier and give myself a chance to recover now that I upped the distance and frequency of my running.  I was also motivated that strength, flexibility and balance don’t just play out in a gym or on a trail but also figure in one’s mental state and the way one deals with others.  It takes practice, mindfulness, repetition ranging from dull to exciting with a lot of ho-hum in between.  Its called training.  When  a challenge comes my way, I say, “I do this everyday.  Why can’t I now?”

But there are other areas of my life that are out of control and I know I have the ability to change them but the thing is, I haven’t been trained to and I don’t know how to approach them.  I know how to wake up for yoga and trail running and go the time and distance for those but it is hard for me to give time and attention to the things in my life that need attending to. I’m hoping that my fitness routine will cross over and give me the confidence to tackle the things that are unpleasant, the things I avoid.  But at the same time I realize that all this working out is an avoidance strategy and keeps me tied up and occupied so I don’t have the time or am too exhausted to do the things that I really don’t want to do.  I’m out of control and confused, but I’m coming to the realization that existence is not as futile as I allow myself to believe.


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